Monday, August 22, 2011

Features-The Jerk's 5 favorite Netflix shows 8/22

It's been a little longer than a week since I was able to update the best of the best Netflix has to offer on the boob-tube.  But alas, I have returned with a list of what all of you Jerks should be watching.


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5.  Deadliest Warrior- What a manly show.  "Let's take 2 killers and test their weapons to see who would kill who".  With warriors like Jesse James, Shaka Zhulu, and The Nazi SS, there is no shortage of carnage dealt forth in the labs.  Inaccurate as the tests may be, it is still just awesome to watch weird dudes with big guns tear stuff apart.


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4.   American Dad-  Family Guy sucks pretty badly.  I hate to say that but it undoubtedly just sucks.  American Dad is a different story altogether.  Seth Macfarlane takes the "Like that time I"'s out of his overweight, high-voiced man-child and replaces them with one of the wittiest, most ridiculous, but mainly- American men to ever grace our screens.




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3.  Park and Recreation- I was born ready.  I'm Ron f*cking Swanson.  Watch Leslie Knope, Tom Haverford, and the rest of the Parks Department take on menial, at best irritating problems with the veracity and passion of- well I can't think of a branch of our government that cares this much.  That sucks.

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2.  Trailer Park Boys- The boys just want to drink liquor, smoke dope, and live like kings in Sunnyvale Trailer Park.  Is that so much to ask?  Apparently it is.  Trailer Park Boys is the remarkably, stupidly genius Canadian comedy about Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles living the white trash dream.  Despite their best efforts the boys just seem to wreak of arrest warrants.  Give this little-known gem a try when you miss out on that promotion.  You deserve it.



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1.  South Park- Every now and then I go on a South Park kick that makes me wonder why I am not always on a South Park kick.  Cartman, Kenny, Stan, and Kyle may have some pretty messed up adventures, but their friendship has kept me in stitches for over a decade now.  Keep it up boys.  Never reach middle school.







Review- Insomnia


I need to start this by saying Insomnia is a very good movie.  It has all the elements a suspense movie should have, and it is acted and directed to a 'T".  I had some issues with Insomnia though.  And I don't think my issues necessarily deal with the story, the talent, or even the archetypal path the movie tends to follow.  My problem is with Christopher Nolan.  That isn't something you'll often see here.  My problem is with Christopher Nolan.  I respect the man.  I have yet to see a Nolan movie that I didn't at least understand the merit in.  I was one of the guys that saw Inception numerous times.  To top that I enjoyed the movie very much.  I know that 1/2 of America thought it was the best thing since sliced bread, but I thought it was very adequate.  Good even.  But not outstanding.  No.  My opinion of Christopher Nolan as a director is not determined by Inception.  It was set long before that on the basis of Memento, The Dark Knight, and The Prestige.  I was disappointed in Christopher Nolan here.

In my opinion, Nolan wears a lot of different masks.  He is a brilliant technological director.  He is also a brilliant comic book reviver, suspense director, and talent-seeker.  What is hard about Insomnia is that it has no traces of Nolan behind the camera.  All of the evidence of a Nolan-esque story is there.  Potentially ambiguous ending, moral wrestling- it seems right up his alley.  But I think the real error here is that he is using somebody else's story.  Nolan thrives on bringing his own scripts to life- not rehashing stories originally told by others.  Still, back to my first comment- Insomnia is a very good movie.

The movie begins with detectives Dormer (Al Pacino) and Eckhart (Martin Donovan) traveling to Alaska to help solve the murder of a 17-year-old girl.  On a side note, I assure you I am not trying to write consecutive reviews about little-girl-murders- it just happened.  As the case is revealed, we learn that Dormer is in a bit of trouble with Internal Affairs.  This, we are told, is a driving factor behind getting the detectives out of town.  Later, in a dinner conversation between Dormer and Eckhart, Eckhart   tells Dormer that he has been offered a deal for immunity for any information he may have regarding the investigation.  Eckhart, being a family man and feeling the need to protect himself, voices his intention to accept the deal to the disgust of Dormer.  From here forward we see their relationship deteriorate as it becomes clear that Dormer feels betrayed.

The case regarding the murder of our young damsel trudges on with most of the heavy-lifting falling to Dormer and the young Ellie Burr (Hilary Swank).  A lead reveals itself in the form of a book bag that is found.  In order to lure the killer back to the site, Dormer orders that a dispatch in search of the book bag be broadcast over public airwaves.  However, when the suspect does arrive he is spooked by a megaphone and darts into the Alaska fog- shooting one of the supporting officers in the leg in the process.  Dormer follows the suspect on foot and as a figure appears in the cloudy haze, Dormer fires.  As he approaches the downed man, he quickly discovers that it is, in fact, his partner Eckhart.  Dormer, knowing how this will look scrubs the scene to make it appear as thought the suspect killed Eckhart.  The one thing he has neglected, is that the suspect saw everything.  Through a series of phone conversations and meetings we learn that our suspect (who reveals his guilt in the murder) is Walter Finch (Robin Williams), a local mystery writer.  Having been caught in the act, and facing an inability to catch a good night's sleep, we see Dormer wrestle with his own morality, and indeed sanity.

Insomnia is not a miss, but it isn't a solid hit either.  The story is intriguing enough and the cast each plays his/her respective role to satisfaction, and in some cases (Robin Williams, Maura Tierney) to perfection.  My only complaint truly is that the story is (and feels) very recycled.  Based off of the Norwegian film of the same name released just 5 years earlier, it lacks the originality and imagination that we have become accustomed to seeing out of Christopher Nolan.  Insomnia is definitely worth a watch.  it is a quality film with capable players, but for this Nolan fan, "short-changed" is the only way to really describe the feeling of the credits rolling.

Overall Rating- 7/10

Monday, August 15, 2011

Review- The Pledge

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I really wanted to like The Pledge.  I love Jack Nicholson.  I love Aaron Echart.  I love Sean Penn in the director's chair (see Into The Wild).  I did not love The Pledge.  The real annoyance of this movie is that it could have been so good.  We'll get to the "fixing" part later, but first let's look at the movie that actually exists.  There is nothing that sticks out in the performances, or even the directing that is particularly off-putting.  In fact, the conviction with which Nicholson plays his grizzled old detective is actually part of what is so vexxing.  Sean Penn does a beautiful job of creating a taut, tense thriller- textbook actually.  The real problem is that he doesn't do anything with the environment he creates.  The story just isn't there.  I did a little research on the film, and it is based on a book by Friedrich DurrenMatt.  This story must have worked on the page, but it certainly doesn't on the movie set.  

The story starts with a retirement.  After 30+ years of service to the Reno Police Department, Jerry Black (Jack Nicholson) is retiring to a life of fishing and leisure.  Of course this all changes when his retirement party is interrupted by news of the brutal murder of a 7-year-old girl that has taken place that night.  Jerry goes with his replacement, Stan Krolak (a mustachioed Aaron Eckhart) to investigate the crime scene.  It is determined that an eye witness has pin-pointed the man he saw fleeing the scene and he is waiting at the police station.  Our suspect is Toby Jay (Benicio Del Toro).  Toby is a mentally retarded man who Krolak sees as an easy confession.  Toby was found guilty in a very similar crime years earlier and, with just a bit of pressure applied, Krolak gets his confession.  Black doesn't buy it though.  He is able to (somehow) sense that Toby was talking about the previous crime.  Of course, none of this matters for Poor Old Toby, as he promptly seizes a cop's gun and blasts his teeth through the wall (literally).  We then see Black move to the area where several similar crimes have taken place and begin to investigate.  From this point forward we have the typical unraveling of clues about town, and we see Black fall in love with a little, blond girl remarkably similar to those murdered, and her mother (In a delightfully trashy turn by Robin Wright-Penn).  As his former colleagues begin to doubt his sanity, Black begins to feel the threat of violence nearing.  When the killer's presence surfaces close to home, can Jerry Black save his new found family?

Did that sound like a cheesy, trailer description?  Well that is probably because that is what watching it feels like.  The movie spends a great deal of time and effort making sure that we care about the characters- that we understand the importance of their plight.  But it takes all of that emotional investment and dumps it in our empty popcorn buckets.  There is no payoff.  No final sense of denouement.  There doesn't always need to be a satisfying ending in film.  But psychological thrillers need to have one.  You can't (effectively) pull a No Country For Old Men-style ending for thrillers.  Something needs to happen.  And the ending for The Pledge just sucks.  Watch it- you'll see what I mean.  I'm not going to say anything else because I don't like spoilers, but check out the Wikipedia site if you don't want to sit through it.  And it really may not be the ending that is so terrible.  It may be that the movie seems like it is going to be great.  The cinematography is beautiful.  The score is perfect.  Even the performances (including cameo roles by Helen Mirren and Harry Dean Stanton) are really, quite good.  It is all of this quality and potential that makes the payoff so disappointing.  

So here is what we have.  A movie with a top-notch cast.  A movie with some beautiful shots of the stunning American west.  A movie with a really compelling story.  And a bad movie.  What does that tell you?  Something went wrong in transit from the page to the screen, and even the capable hands of veterans like Penn and Nicholson weren't enough to separate The Pledge from the dime-a-dozen thrillers that come out every month.  Sorry Jerks, but stick to Unbreakable and The Usual Suspects.

Overall Rating- 4/10



Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Features-The Jerk's 5 favorite Netflix shows 8/2

These aren't the 5 most critically acclaimed shows available through Netflix.  They aren't the 5 most watched shows on Netflix either.  These are the 5 shows on Netflix that get the most viewing from this Jerk.  I love watching movies on Netflix- LOVE IT.  But more often I need to relax after a day of school and work and just gaze blankly into the boob-tube.  These are the best shows to enjoy when you just need to enjoy a show.


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5.  American Dad-  Family Guy sucks pretty badly.  I hate to say that but it undoubtedly just sucks.  American Dad is a different story altogether.  Seth Macfarlane takes the "Like that time I"'s out of his overweight, high-voiced man-child and replaces them with one of the wittiest, most ridiculous, but mainly- American men to ever grace our screens.

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4.  The Office- The Office has fallen off a bit in recent years.  I'll be the first to admit that.  But there was a time when Michael, Dwight, Jim, and the rest of our weekly co-workers made us enjoy Thursday nights.  We all clearly enjoy Thursdays for It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia now, but The Office is what we can stream instantly anytime.  Never a bad choice after a particularly horrible day at work.

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3.  Intervention- This is going to sound bad.  I am giving you ample warning.  But there is nothing better than being able to say "Hey, at least I'm not that guy".  I told you it would sound bad.  But it is so true.  Relax.  Kick your feet up.  Crack open a cold one.  Hell, crack open 6.  Because I guarantee you can flip this show on and confidently say "It's okay.  At least I don't huff computer air-duster and walk on sunshine all day".

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2.  Chappelle's Show- Sketch comedy is great.  Shows like SNL, and MADtv are pretty enjoyable.  Dave Chappelle reinvented sketch comedy.  In 2 (sort of 3) seasons, Dave Chappelle turned sketch comedy from something you chuckle absently at, to something you laugh uncontrollably, constantly at.  Everything about this is amazing.  The stand-up, the sketches, the cast, the writing- everything.  What a shame Dave Chappelle retired.  No less, this show will remain a testament to one of the funniest men of the last 20 years.

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1.  Trailer Park Boys- The boys just want to drink liquor, smoke dope, and live like kings in Sunnyvale Trailer Park.  Is that so much to ask?  Apparently it is.  Trailer Park Boys is the remarkably, stupidly genius Canadian comedy about Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles living the white trash dream.  Despite their best efforts the boys just seem to wreak of arrest warrants.  Give this little-known gem a try when you miss out on that promotion.  You deserve it.


And stay tuned!  These shows will be updated weekly according to what the Jerk is currently watching.  Leave a comment. Tell me what I am missing out on.

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Review- About A Boy




What a pleasant surprise.  I'm not just talking about the movie itself, but who knew Hugh Grant could act?  I sat down to watch this movie only after seeing that it had the unbelievable score of 93% on Rotten Tomatoes.  I thought to myself, "You keep reviewing really heavy, dark films.  Maybe try a chick flick for a change."  As a side note, you will find that I have a strange affinity toward romantic comedies- R-rated ones.  I know they aren't for everyone, but movies like Love, Actually, and Knocked Up bring a certain sense of optimism that probably isn't entirely realistic, but a nice escape from reality no less.  About a Boy is not one of these movies.  I find myself once again reviewing a sort of morbid film here.  However, the difference between About a Boy and, say Very Bad Things is that not only was this movie underscored with light-hearted relief from its darker tones, but it was good.  Very good.

About A Boy is the first grown up effort from the the Weitz brothers.  That's right: the same guys who brought you American Pie have moved on to slightly more adult-pitched ventures, adapting this Nick Hornby novel.  The movie starts examining a day in the life of Will (Hugh Grant).  Will is a happy bachelor drifting though life alone, jobless, but mostly satisfied, living off of the royalties of a song his father wrote in the 1950's.  He is a bachelor to the n-th degree- and quite the eligible one at that.  One day, in his many womanizing ventures, Will meets and begins to see a woman who we find out has a son.  As he tries to decide how he should go about ending things, something amazing happens- she ends it.  Overcome by the lack of guilt, Will decides this is worth exploring and begins attending SPAT meetings (Single Parents Alone Together).  He meets mostly frumpy women in their 40's throwing a group pity party, but does manage to see a light through the storm in Suzie- an attractive 30-something single mother.  The two go out a few times (as naturally Will has invented a son who doesn't live with him).  It is during one of their dates that Will meets Marcus (Nichloas Hoult), an intriguing (if slightly odd) boy whose mother (Toni Collette) is in a bad way and may just "need a weekend to herself".  This was a bad idea.  After returning Marcus home, it is discovered that his mother has attempted suicide.  She, however, survives and is brought right back home to continue raising her son (now I don't know how things are across the pond, but that raised a bit of skepticism for this American-bred viewer).  Marcus decides that two just isn't enough and that a third- being Will, of course- is needed just in case.  And so begins our journey of boy changing man, man seeing more to life, and eventual happiness for all.  

What is remarkable about About a Boy is that, while the themes are pretty heavy, the humor remains light, ensuring its audience is never laughing solely because we need a break from all the depression.  Hugh Grant has never been used more effectively than this.  For the most part we see him in roles that play directly to his shtick- what I like to call the Jimmy Stewart shtick.  While these performers are very different, they both managed to make it based on their ability to be so lovingly befuddled all the time.  This seemed really fresh for about a movie or so- A movie.  But About a Boy sees Grant (for once) playing a character that is shallow, devious, and just sort of a rascal.  And it is awesome.  Hugh Grant (imagine I'm saying this through a megaphone)- DO MORE MOVIES LIKE THIS AND PEOPLE WILL COME TO SEE THEM.  Of course there are several other strong performances throughout the movie, not the least of which is Toni Collette's suicidal mother.  Also a strong turn from the young Nicholas Hoult, and the more seasoned Rachel Weisz certainly contribute to the quality of the film. 

Overall, About a Boy is a sweet, touching story about suicide... which i didn't really know was possible.  Due to the strong performances, capable script adaptation, and surprising skill behind the camera, the movie becomes more than just your run-of-the-mill romantic comedy.  Movies like Notting Hill, and The Bridget Jones Diary may be where Hugh Grant earns his big paychecks, but watch About a Boy and I think you'll agree- we could use a little less boyish schmuck, and a little more adult jerk.

Overall Rating- 7.5/10

Monday, July 25, 2011

Attention Jerks!- FilmJerk is going Netflix

In my infinite wisdom I have noticed one thing over my last week of work.  That's right- one.  Given that I only really "work" for about an hour and a half a week, I feel this is a great accomplishment.  What I have noticed is that (to my knowledge) there is no resource on these great interwebs that devotes itself to the viewing- and the reviewing- of movies that can be found on the Netflix Instant Cue.  And ONLY movies that are available through the Netflix Instant Cue.  So you may be like:

"Hey I want to watch something on Netlix.  But there are so many choices, I need a little guidance."
BOOM
"Yo son.  I got the hook-up.  Check this shit out."

So as of today, July 25th 2011, this website's reviews will be devoted solely to guiding you in your quest for movies you don't want to pay more than $8/month to see.  Stay tuned for films you can blindly judge based on my flawless opinions AND then watch immediately from home.  Keep pimpin' Jerks.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Review- The Shape of Things




Neil Labute is the man.  There is no way around that.  I see a lot of feedback on various sites criticizing Labute for his directing work on films like the remake of The Wicker Man, and Death at a Funeral and those criticisms are fair.  He really hasn't directed anything of much merit since this gem.  But I still find it amazing how quickly people can forget about a director's back-catalogue once they start releasing flops.  Let's not forget that this is the man who also gave us In The Company of Men, and Your Friends and Neighbors.  This film, as well as those last two, is a study in the human potential for evil.  Not in the classic, serial-killing, bloodfest sort of way, but in how we interact with each other.

The Shape of Things was originally a stage play so it comes across as such.  There are only four characters and the story is rooted firmly in the dialogue between said characters.  Adam (Paul Rudd) is a regular, if homely college student working his way through school.  One day at his museum job he meets Evelyn (Rachel Weisz) in a classic boy-meets-girl type of way- or so we think.  It isn't long before the two strike up a conversation regarding the nature of art and its subjectivity (as we learn that Evelyn is pursuing a master's degree in art).  The two hit it off and enter a romantic relationship.  But the real fun begins when we meet the pair of friends whom Adam has known since his freshman year, Phillip (Frederick Weller) and Jenny (Gretchen Mol).  The pair are engaged and go on a series of double dates with Adam and Evelyn until, in a hilarious scene featuring all four actors, an argument ensues over the defacement of a statue in the museum Adam works at (which we learn earlier was the work of Evelyn).  In this scene we are also told, in a brilliantly subtle series of jests that Adam and Jenny had a "thing" a few years back, but it never really came to fruition.  As we proceed the film sees Jenny and Adam cheating on their respective mates as Adam begins to grow more attractive with significant coaxing from Evelyn.  At her request Adam has lost weight, changed his hairstyle, switched from glasses to contacts and even gotten a nose job.  When Evelyn discovers Adam's acts of infidelity via a journal of his progress he has been keeping, yet another argument ensues in a coffee shop between Adam, Evelyn and Jenny.  This brings us to Evelyn's big thesis presentation.  I will stop here for the purposes of maintaining the true draw of the film/play.  But suffice it to say this quickly becomes more than your run-of-the-mill romantic comedy.  And if you have seen Labute's early works it will come as no surprise that the conclusion of The Shape of Things will leave you with a reaction.

What I have left out here will be the deciding factor in whether or not you enjoy this movie, or any of Labute's stage-to-screen works, really.  He is a very polarizing director and even moreover, a polarizing writer.  The Shape of Things is meant to be discussed.  And given the nature of the ending, not talking about it seems highly unlikely to this reviewer, so I would recommend seeing it with a friend.  The performances delivered here are all wonderful, but the reason you haven't seen much talk of them is that the acting is so secondary to the story.  Overall, The Shape of Things is an astounding achievement in drama, both on stage (I have just had the privilege of seeing it mounted here in Des Moines) and on screen.  See it.  Talk about it.  Judge for yourself if art is really as "subjective" as we claim it is.

Rating- 10/10 

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Features- 5 movies that are American as Hell

With the realease of Captain America: The First Avenger mere hours away, I thought I'd take a look at some other movies that just scream America from top to bottom.  Be warned- patriotism of these levels may just start another war.

Team America: World Police

This one may be a little obvious but there is no denying its American...-ity.  Just try to watch this movie without, at least once yelling "America: F*ck Yeah".  It can't be done.  Not even by the hippest of hippies.  It just can't be done.

The Sandlot

I know that there are tons of movies out there about the sport that is "as American as Apple Pie", but none of them hold a candle to The Sandlot.  It has everything- kids with a dream, the fourth of July, a really hot chick being tricked into intimacy with a guy 1/3 her age.  Okay, that last one may not be all that American, but still, what is more American than some good old fashioned CHAW?

Die Hard

All-American, Bruce Willis just wants to take down some foreigners.  Without any real help from the police, or even the feds, this is the definition of bleeding red, white, and blue.  Hey John McClane, what do you say to defending a giant office building from some Krauts?  John McClane- "Yippee Kay Ay, Mother F*ckers".

Top Gun

I'll be the first to admit, I don't like Top Gun.  It is hard for me to watch this movie without wanting to punch Tom Cruise in the face.  And I'm one of the 4 Tom Cruise fans left.  But you have to admit- big explosions, sand volleyball, blind patriotism- It has America written all over it.

The Jerk

"But Dustin, this movie doesn't have anything to do with America", you might say.  Oh how wrong you are.  the movie centers around a complete idiot who, by pure dumb-luck, manages to become a multi-millionaire for a really stupid product, most likely assembled by toddlers in Korea.  It doesn't get much more American than that.

God Bless America!

Review- Very Bad Things


Just a quick disclaimer- many of the movies I review here will not necessarily be new.  One of the goals of this blog is to provide a sufficient amount of reviews for movies that can be watched through the Netflix instant cue.

What a very bad movie (See what I did there?  With the play on words?).  I was really excited to see this one for multiple reasons.  I love Peter Berg in the director's chair.  Over the last 5 years "Friday Night Lights" has become one of my favorite shows on TV and knowing that the same creator/director had helmed a deeply dark comedy got me itching to see it.  I also love this entire ensemble.  Jon Favreau, Daniel Stern, Jeremy Piven, That dude who was forced to use the penis-blade thing in Seven, Christian Slater, Cameron Diaz- what's not to like?  Apparently everything.  I had no problem with the darker aspects of this movie.  What I have a problem with is that the film meanders along in such dark territory for the entirety of its runtime, that it completely forgets to be funny.

What a waste of talent.  I frankly don't know how you can put all of these people in a film together and have it not be funny.  The one exception is Cameron Diaz.  As the ultimate bridezilla she perfectly shirks (and participates in) the gruesome acts committed to avoid a postponement of her precious wedding.  But aside from this surprisingly twisted turn, the film offers very little.  I don't know that the blame lies with the actors, however.  Rather, I think this horrible "film" can be credited mostly to their agents.  I don't know who picked this script, presented it to this talented group, and convinced them it was good, but if there is any justice in the world they have been excommunicated from ever working in Hollywood again. 

The movie starts out with its core group of characters preparing for a bachelor party for their best bud (Jon Favreau) in Las Vegas.  Well worn territory to be sure.  However (and this may be the one positive part of this review) nobody can blame the story for not being unique.  Upon arriving in Vegas, the gang has one hell of a night with all of the gambling, booze, and cocaine characteristic of a Vegas bachelor party.  But then the real treat comes.  One of the gentleman (played by Christian Slater) has hired an escort just for the boys.  The idea being that the groom-to-be can spend one last night on the pony.  Declining the offer, another buddy (Jeremy Piven) decides he should partake, so as not to waste the bought-and-paid-for hospitality.  Things start about as you'd expect in the hotel bathroom, but quickly turn bad as the escort is impaled on the towel hanger of the bathroom door.  Dead hookers are not good, agrees our group of middle class suburbanites. After also laying waste to a hotel security guard who pushes his way into their room, the group decides rather than call the authorities, they should bury the bodies in the desert.  From this point on the story completely falls apart as we see the characters eventually begin to crack under the stress and turn on each other.  By the end of the movie the group of 5 has dwindled to 2 survivors present at the wedding. 

The problem with this movie is that while you watch it, even as an amateur viewer, you can find so many missed opportunities.  The plot for a very darkly comedic film is there.  It's the script that just misses on all of these occasions.  Daniel Stern may be the most ridiculously underused of the bunch.  We all know this man can be funny from the Home Alone movies.  But you would never even guess he had any proclivity toward comedy in Very Bad Things (even dark comedy).  Where this movie tries to be in the realm of great films like In The Company of Men and Ghost World, it ends up being much closer to- I can't even think of another dark comedy I hated this much.  Don't be drawn in by the stellar cast, or great director of this movie.  You'll surely enjoy Gigli more.

Rating- 2/10

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Feature- Top 10 performances by 2011 Emmy nominees on film

Occassionally a television actor will reach the big screen and give us a performance indicating where they really belong.  Let's take a look at some of this year's Emmy nominees' best film roles.  A quick disclaimer- Kathy Bates's performance in Misery is not here because I don't think she deserved any Emmy nod this year over say... KYRA SEDGWICK.


10.  Jon Hamm- The Town- Easy pick, this one.  In my opinion, this is one of the most criminally underrated films of the last 5 years, being snubbed at all of the major awards shows for the likes of The Kids are Alright (really?).  Hamm plays the FBI agent charged with bringing down Ben Affleck's crew of professional bank robbers.


9.  Jim Parsons- Garden State- A small role, but outstanding turn from Parsons in Zach Braff's 2004 directorial debut.  He plays the former high school pee-on who has just been promoted to Jouster at the local Medieval Times restaurant.  He is also banging his former classmate's (Peter Sarsgaard) mom.


8. Amy Poehler- Wet Hot American Summer- One of Poehler's first features outside of taped segments of Upright Citizens Brigade.  She plays a hilariously uptight camp counselor who only wants to put on a great talent show for the last day of summer.  I might add that Bradley Cooper is her partner-in-crime and does an equally bang-up job.


7.  Ty Burrell- Dawn of the Dead- Who would ever believe Phil Dunfee could be a jackass?  Anybody who has ever seen Dawn of the Dead, that's who.  Here Burrell plays overly-confident Steve Marcus, whose loud mouth, and disagreeable personality eventually turn on him.

6.  Timothy Olyphant- The Girl Next Door- My personal favorite Emmy nominee this year.  Finally recognized for his brilliant work in Justified, Olyphant plays a character you might expect his TV persona, Raylan Givens to lock up.  He plays the greasy porn producer nemesis of a young Emile Hirsch, as the latter tries valiantly to save his new girlfriend (Elisha Cuthbert) from the smut industry.


5.  Alan Cumming- Reefer Madness- Okay, so I may be cheating a little bit with this one as Reefer Madness is a Showtime movie, but I think this performance merits it.  Cumming plays the lecturer walking the parents of the local town through the story of Jimmy and Mary- a young couple torn apart by the evils of- wait for it- MARIJUANA!


4.  Steve Carrell- The 40 Year Old Virgin- Carrell may have gotten his start on "The Daily Show", but The 40 Year Old Virgin is what made him a superstar.  Backed by a hilarious supporting cast, all I can say about Carrell's wonderful performance is "KELLY CLARKSON"!  If you haven't seen this one then no amount of words can explain the glory.


3.  Steve Buscemi- Fargo- Buscemi has had a grab-bag of great roles in film ranging from the goofy (Big Daddy), to the profoundly dramatic (Reservoir Dogs).  As Carl Showalter, he is a mix of the two.  In classic Coen brothers style, Buscemi is a quirky "just kinda generally funny lookin'" half of a couple of crooks hired to kidnap the wife of a client.


2.  Laura Linney- Kinsey- Playing the wife of the infamous Dr. Kinsey (Liam Neeson), Linney proves once again why she is one of the best living actresses to grace our screens.  This Oscar nominated turn sees her vulnerable homemaker questioning the research she has blindly supported for so many years in a touching, moving performance.


1.  Alec Baldwin- Glengarry Glen Ross- Alec Baldwin takes the cake here.  And for once it isn't for portraying Jack Donaghy.  Baldwin's part in Glengarry Glen Ross is limited.  In fact, it is only one monologue.  This scene was added to the movie version by screenwriter David Mamet, having been left out of the original stage play.  Thank God it was.  With no more than 10 minutes of screen time, Baldwin delivers this "brass balls" monologue like the old pro we perenially see gobbling up gongs at awards ceremonies.

Agree?  Disagree?  Did I cover my bases or leave out glaring omissions?  Only your comments will answer that.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Review- The Bridge




My roommate loves documentaries.  My roommate before him loves documentaries.  I like documentaries.  So when one of them brought home The Bridge, I was a bit skeptical.  I have never really been one for extremely dark movies.  Movies like A Serbian Film, Irreversible, and Antichrist bother me.  So when I read the description for the bridge I was more than a little concerned that I'd be permanently scarred by its content.  The premise is simple- about 25 people kill themselves by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge every year.  A camera crew set up spots all around the bridge for an entire year in hopes to capture some of the victims.  The result is The Bridge.  Not only did the filmmakers succeed in capturing almost all of the 24 suicides that year, they tracked down the friends, and loved ones of the victims and interviewed them.  While the film seems to be preoccupied with the morbid (namely people jumping off a bridge to their death), the group with which I watched the film seemed to take something entirely different from it.

The one similarity between almost all of the victims of The Bridge is that those who knew them best seemed dishearteningly indifferent toward their "friend"'s plight.  Some of the interviewees even claim that they saw the suicide coming.  Others seem unsurprised and talk very bluntly about the victim as though they had merely gone bungee jumping.  Very rare was the interview where the friend or family member seemed shocked, devastated, or even upset by the tragic death of the jumper.  This of course led us to ask: Why?  Why didn't the people who claimed to see this coming stop the person?  Why does nobody seem to care that their loved one is gone?  Why do the hundreds of on-lookers never (or rarely) interfere?  these questions are what will stick with you about the movie- not the deaths themselves.

This is dangerous territory for a filmmaker.  Tread too softly and the film loses its credibility.  Go overboard, and the film becomes exploitative.  Pleasingly, The Bridge finds a happy medium.  The film follows each jumper from the top of the bridge to the water.  But what it leaves out is the marvelous part.  There is little zooming, or examination of the victim after they fall to their wet demise.  The film makes sure the viewer can see the seriousness of the act, but doesn't dwell on the more gruesome aspects.  Therein lies the genius of this documentary.

There are other traits to The Bridge that make it a documentary well above the rest, such as the linear feel to the film.  Rather than presenting each jump as an isolated act, the movie follows one particular character from the beginning of his trip to the bridge, to his grizzly end in a beautiful ending shot, which I won't spoil here.  The Bridge is one of the better documentaries I have ever seen.  It's subject matter, while morbid, goes much deeper than Faces Of Death or many of the other shock docs out there.  Do yourself a favor and try it.  It may not be for everyone, but you'll quickly know if this is the kind of documentary for you.

Rating- 9/10

Monday, July 18, 2011

Review- Bully

I want to start this review by saying that I am not a Larry Clark fan.  I find his debut (and best known film) Kids off-putting, grossly taboo, and without much merit outside of its inherent shock value.  Wassup Rockers seemed to desperately strive to make a point, but never fully realized its potential.  Bully, however is a different beast altogether.  Its content is very reminiscent of Kids on the surface.  Lots of teenagers having sex and doing drugs as they drift aimlessly in and out of each others' lives.  But where Kids relies on the "jaw-drop factor", Bully tells a story.  A twisted, disturbing, often sickening story- but a story no less.

Bully is, at its core, a story of friendship, torment, and revenge.  It tells the story of Bobby (Nick Stahl) and Marty (Brad Renfro), best friends since grade school who are now drifting through their late teens in an endless cycle of debauchery.  Bobby is the titular bully, but not in the way you may think.  He assaults Marty on a regular basis as well as subjecting him to humiliating, degrading acts of sexual deviance, many times involving homosexual schemes in which Bobby sees monetary gains.  One particularly vomit-inducing scene sees a 50-something, presumably gay man offer Bobby $100 if Marty will get onstage at a club and dance around half-naked while patrons stuff dollar bills into his underwear.  Did I mention Marty is not gay?  Marty actually meets and courts another wasteland-teen, Lisa (Rachel Miner) throughout the course of the film.  Perhaps the most chilling aspect of Bobby is that we are told, through a series of conversations with his over-bearing father, that Bobby has a future.  He will soon be heading to college in hopes of partnering with said father in a tinting/car stereo business.  Bobby sexually assaults both Marty and Lisa at least once that we see, as well as raping Lisa's friend, Heather (Kelli Garner) whilst insisting she proclaim he is "the best I've ever had".  Not exactly child-friendly fare.  This abuse continues until one day Lisa suggests to Marty, in a heart-breakingly vulnerable scene, that the pair kill Bobby.  The couple drag other acquaintances into the plot including Derek (Daniel Franzese) and Donny (Michael Pitt).  When they finally decide they'll need some help they approach supposed mob "hitman", Hitman (Leo Fitzpatrick) to join the party.  We then see the ill-conceived plot carried out by the group under the guise that Heather was "into" her sexual encounter with Bobby.  As Bobby is lured to the beach, the others skirmishly prepare themselves for the murder, using pipes, knives, and all assortment of blunt objects.  The rest of the film studies the almost-immediate unraveling of the individual group members through boasting, gloating, and general teenage loud-mouthiness.

Bully succeeds where Kids fails. This can be credited largely to the far superior cast of young actors at play in the former.  As Marty, Brad Renfro is as honest, vulnerable, and lost as any teen portrayed on film.  In the aforementioned scene in which he breaks down to the point of tears whilst talking with Lisa, it is hard to remember that this is a movie.  Every impulse is to reach through the screen and comfort Marty- tell him everything will be okay.  Lie to him.  As Bobby, Nick Stahl becomes one of the most ruthless, despicable villains of the 90's.  His blatant disregard for life, dignity, and friendship becomes so real that until the actual gruesome murder, we come to wish his ill fate upon him.  In addition to the power-house performances at the center of the film, early performances from Michael Pitt, and Rachel Miner are also a treat.  Pitt playing the acid-loving, almost retarded boytoy of Heather, and Miner playing the sympathetic if not innocent girlfriend.

One crucial detail about Bully is that it is all based on true events that occured in the same region of Florida as the movie was filmed.  For this reason, Clark is the perfect choice to helm the project.  This story would lose most of its power in different hands.  As I said before, Clark is not my favorite filmmaker.  But one thing is undeniably true about him: he isn't afraid to "go there".  Bully requires that we, as an audience, feel absolute disgust toward Bobby.  At one point in the movie we see him look at himself in the mirror and spit on his reflection.  As the audience, this is wonderful release.  We get to see Bobby do what we have all been wanting to.  As hard as it is at times to watch, we need to see the sexual assault, we need to see the ruthless beatings, in a word, we need to see the bully. 

The film is not without its faults.  Criticisms of Clark being "exploitative" and "perverted" are often hurled around.  Critics claim that he is more interested in his own sick attraction toward sexually active teens than toward telling a story that holds any sort of meaning.  I believe this fully in the case of Kids.  I believe it partially in Bully.  While the unspeakable acts Bobby commits need to be seen to be fully realized, the detail and length which Clark dedicates to the acts teeters on exploitation.  The script also meanders in places.  On the whole I would say that about 20-25% of the scenes in the first half of the film should have been left on the cutting room floor as they do not drive the narrative forward in any way.  They serve only to shock.

The end result?  Despite its flaws, Bully is a movie that effectively tells the story of what happens when the perenially bullied, become the savage bullies.  Thanks to the surprisingly capable direction of Larry Clark, and his cast of future-stars, Bully becomes more than a film you watch and forget.  it becomes a lingering disturbance int he back of your head.  And maybe that is what we all need to prevent tragedies like that which is portrayed in Bully.

Rating- 8/10

Welcome Jerks!

To the 3 friends I am making read this blog- Welcome!  I've never had a blog before, but I feel like my boundless knowledge of everything film should not go unseen/read by the world.  What you are going to find on this blog is an assortment of reviews, features, and general buffoonery about your favorite (and least favorite) movies.  I have no life.  No desire for anything greater than can be offered from my local arthouse theatre, or the comfort of my Netflix viewing area (or couch- it's just a couch).  And as I am sitting here at work today I realize that puts me in a very advantageous position.  Why see the world when I have seen Around the World in 80 Days?  Why experience love when I can easily rent Love, Actually?  Why live the gangster lifestyle when I can watch Ray Liotta do it instead? 

And so, without further ado, I present FilmJerk.